My favourite piece of 'real-life' dialogue of all time took place about two years ago at a party held by my old journalism tutor, Angela, a stern feminist of the old-school. The fact that the payoff comes from Kearns, a Telegraph-reading sports lover certainly adds to the quality of the exchange, particularly as him and Angela were often at loggerheads. Loggerheads! What a word!
Ed: "So, we're having a house-warming party and the theme is 'film and television of the 80s'."
Angela: "Who are you going as?"
Ed: "Sigourney Weaver."
Angela: "Hmmm. I didn't have time to watch any films in the '80s - I was far too busy with parenthood."
Kearns: "Parenthood the film?"