Friday, November 23, 2007

Football in mouth

I was OOO yesterday having all sorts of crazy fun in Leeds, so I didn't have a chance to write something cliched and boring about how rubbish England are at football, following their defeat to Croatia in the Euro 2008 qualifiers.

It was all very depressing, but commentator John Motson considerably cheered me up after the final whistle when he hilariously combined doomy summary with a ridiculous last spurt of optimism: "England are out of the European Championships... Unless Andora score in the next four minutes!"

Seconds later it was back to the pundits, with gloommeister Alan Hansen suggesting that the match was "definitely a low point in English history". He's right: the first day of the Somme, the arrival of the Black Death in England and the Amritsar Massacre really did pale into insignificance.


Unknown said...

haha, brilliant. Football once again being given a lot more importance than it deserves.

rashbre said...

I still don't get how a team costing, say, £200m can't beat a team costing, say, ten bob.

Edmund Hardy said...

I think Hansen's view of history is a good deal more complicated than you suggest; if this was a "low", "point", then the model of time is not necessarily a graph, but something more akin to a sedimentary rock-brained sliding geography. In such a view, the Somme might actually be a high point, or plateau, the Amritsar Massacre a moral free fall, and the Black Death a thick forested area where the Army practise operations and hence it says DANGER KEEP OUT on the map. One reason why Hansen's book, "A Matter of Opinion", didn't do that well, is because the opinions concerned were rarely football related, and more to do with rethinking the foundations of historical thought.

Anonymous said...

It was much better to be supporting Ecuador beat Peru.